Monday, August 21, 2006

THE COMPANY YOU KEEP

Do you want to make some changes in your life? Looking to start a business? Change careers? Make more money? Have a better marriage? Well, aside from reading books on the subject and doing research on the web, the best way to make a change is to find someone who has what you want and talk to them! Interview the business owner about her experiences as an entrepreneur. Take the guy out to lunch who can teach you about investments. Talk to your grandparents about what it took to stay married for 50 years. Look for inspiration from the people who have already started down the path you are embarking on. They've made mistakes that you can learn from. They can pass on tips to help you stay focused on your goal. Most importantly, they can help you to see that what you want really is possible.





STRESSED OUT???

Who isn't stressed out these days, I wonder!! I was hanging out with my 13 year old step son asking him all about what is going on in his life ("nothin much" was as far as I could get) when I hit on a subject that perked him up....video games. "So", I ask, "what do you love about playing video games?" Know what he said? The number 1 reason he liked playing video games was because it calmed him down when he was stressed out and didn't feel like thinking. STRESSED OUT? School is not even in session and this kid is stressed out? Where did he learn about high stess levels and why does he think this is the best way to lower them? What is he anxious about? So, it got me thinking......


We all carry around worries and concerns that we need to deal with daily. How many times have we said to other people that we just can't take it--we are frustated, unhappy or just plain exhausted. What is it we reach for when we feel this way? Some go off to the gym. Some to the bar. Some to a friends house or out for coffee. Some block everyone out and withdraw.

What are we teaching out kids about managing anxiety? What are we teaching each other about finding our center and feeling calm? When did thinking and feeling become so undesirable and painful?

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem." --Theodore Rubin

I love that quote because it really offers another perspective on how we can view issues that confront us. Tuning out and turning off are valuable tools to have to lower stress levels from time to time but let's not stop there. We are capable of coming up with so many other ways of dealing with life's "problems". What would be possible if we encouraged our our kids (and one another) to reconnect and really listen to what is going on inside of us? Is there something we need more of in our lives? Less of? Sometimes, we may want to choose nurturing over numbing...